Hazardous Material: An Interview with the Hazard County Girls
by Marcus Gilmer

NOLAFugees correspondent Marcus Gilmer sets the record scraight on New Orleans' own Hazard County Girls.

The secret’s out. For all the times that words like “gloomy” and “intense” pop up in reviews, the Hazard County Girls are actually quite pleasant people. One could even use the word “fun.” On the patio of the Circle Bar, the statue of Robert E. Lee with his back to us, guitarist and lead vocalist Christy Kane and drummer Sharon Heather (bass player Jennifer K. is working tonight) crack each other up as much as they excitedly talk about their new record, Katrina, and miniature horses. The banter is quick, lively, and, at times, hard to keep up with amidst all the laughter.

The new record, “Divine Armor,” was recorded last summer and originally scheduled for release in October but delayed because of Katrina. In the immediate aftermath, the record was the last thing on their minds. “We wanted to focus on what was important,” says Christy. The band was out on tour when the storm hit and afterwards went on their separate ways: Jennifer to Dallas, Christy to Virginia, and Sharon to Florida. According to Sharon, “None of us could come back. We thought we would have to rerecord the whole thing.” The master recordings of the new record were still at Christy’s apartment. Christy had been in the midst of setting up the cover photo when they left on tour. “The scene was still on my table. When we came back, everything was fine.” Both the recording (the record’s producer had evacuated with the hard drive that held the record as well) and the cover scene were undamaged.

After being initially pushed back to January, the band decided to hold off until May for a release date. “We put so much work into it, why rush it?” suggest Christy. Sharon adds, “At the time, there was no feeling of joy. We were looking at more important things.” Despite the circumstances, the band is very proud of the new record. Sharon describes the process as “awesome” and Christy calls it “a very cohesive collection. We’re proud of the whole thing.”

Continuing the somber tone I began the interview with, when asked if they mind being referred to as “gloomy,” both women laugh it off. “It’s no mystery to us,” says Christy. “It’s true.” As for the insistence of reviews to focus on the gender of the band (one Times-Picayune review amusingly compared the HCG to the Donnas, akin to comparing Black Sabbath to the Beach Boys), they’re only mildly wary. Sharon says, “It’s unnecessary. There have been some new reviews that don’t mention our gender at all and it’s refreshing.”

The Hazard County Girls are also big fans of the local rock scene, a scene that has recently flourished despite the closing of popular clubs like The Matador and the Mermaid Lounge. “It’s not as competitive here,” explains Christy, a veteran of the New York music scene. “It’s more about…” “The enjoyment of music,” Sharon finishes, Christy nodding in agreement. Christy continues, “[The New York scene] is so spread out, eight bands a night. It’s so hard and expensive to live there that it was hard to get enjoyment out of it.” Some of the band’s favorite venues in the city include One Eyed Jacks, the Circle Bar, and the Mermaid Lounge (“R.I.P.,” says Sharon).

If nothing else, the members of the band are levelheaded and humble, despite their standing as one of the more popular local rock bands with success outside of the city as well. Sharon points out, “We’ve never played in New Orleans with someone we didn’t get along with.” Outside the city has occasionally been a different story. With shared laughter, the pair recalls a show in Breckinridge, Colorado where they shared the stage with none other than 2 Live Crew. “We were a freaky novelty act,” Sharon adds, causing the two to share more of their now-signature laughter.

While New Orleans waits to elect a new mayor, I ask how the Hazard County Girls would rule the city if they were mayor: with a white glove or an iron fist? The pair laughs and Christy answers emphatically, “A fingerless laced glove over an iron fist.” She pauses before adding, “holding a hammer.” Sharon asks, confused, “A ham?” “No,” Christy laughs. “A hammer.”

I ask them what life would be like under such a rule. Sharon quickly answers, “A lot of sweets. Cookies, cupcakes…” Christy picks up the train of thought: “A lot of laughter and a lot of tears. You have to learn to knit. And lots of animals.” Sharon nods, “Yeah, lots of pets.” “You have to be a farm hand at a miniature horse farm,” Christy tacks on.

I ask the ladies about their dream lineup to play with. The two share a knowing look and began to rattle off bands faster than I can keep up with. Sharon suggests, “I’d love to tour with Suplecs, High on Fire, and Mastodon.” Christy, nodding, says, “I’d only add the Melvins.” Sharon “oohs” in agreement. “That’s a good one.” Other bands they throw out are Van Halen (“But only with David Lee Roth” says Sharon), Led Zeppelin, Black Sabbath, Thin Lizzy, and Nick Cave. Christy mentions The Birthday Party, The Gun Club, and PJ Harvey. The two laugh as Christy says ZZ Top and explains, “We once had a toothless biker tell us we sounded like ZZ Top.”

As for guilty pleasures, the ladies are a little more coy. Sharon selects New Edition and adds, “I’m also a sucker for those Monster Ballads.” Christy agrees with New Edition as a choice but never definitively answers. I mention the Kelly Clarkson CD I have in my car to pry something out of her, but she stays mum.

I ask the two what New Orleans area rapper they would most like to do a rap/rock duet with: Master P, Juvenile, or Mystikal. Sharon is enthusiastic about Master P. “He’s quite the entrepreneur. He could take us to another realm.” Christy agrees but adds, “Mystikal would be good, too. And B.G. is blowing up big.”

With that settled, I turn to a potential set list of cover songs if they were asked to play the mayoral inauguration. Among the favorites are “Born on the Bayou,” “Eye of the Tiger,” HCG staple “Mr. Telephone Man” (“Because both men need some communication skills,” quips Christy), “I Need a Hero,” and “Sabbath, Bloody Sabbath.” The two then try to remember other songs, sometimes singing a line to jog their memory.
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As the walk down memory lane continues, Sharon pulls out her cell phone, apologizing profusely, and says that she has to phone in their order for dinner from a local burrito restaurant. She gets Christy’s order and excuses herself to make the call. Christy and I continue discussing the song selection for a few more moments before Sharon interrupts the conversation with another series of apologies and asks Christy a question about her order. Christy confirms the order and turns back to me, saying with a smile, “See? Not only are we happy, but we’re also not rude.”

***Catch the Hazard County Girls live at One Eyed Jacks with M.O.T.T. on Friday, May 12th. The new record, “Divine Armor,” is now available on CDBaby.com, soon via iTunes, and will be available at the show and after that at fine music establishments around the city. The show will also double as a fundraiser for the family of Michael Frey, a close friend of the band who was tragically murdered in the Marigny earlier this year. A donation box will be available at the merchandise table, with those funds and a portion of the door being donated to Frey’s family or a charity of their choice.

Marcus Gilmer is a regular correspondent for NOLAFugees.com He works, lives, and rocks out in the chocolaty goodness of Uptown.